My translation of a Bengali poem

Illness

                      (I translated it from Arun Mitra’s Bengali poem ‘Ashukh’)

From school, then from college I returned home shivering, then straight under a wrapper.

What a beautiful shivering! I grasped the wrapper from head to foot lurking. Turning on, folding the knees and hiding the face, I’m shivering a little. So much comfort! I’m telling with a crying of happiness in mind, shivering! Long-live! Dedicated myself in life’s happiness. I love you shivering!

The curtain moved away long ago. Light is glowing on my face. And what a fragrance it is! Strip of cloth is put on my forehead, denoting with fragrance. Someone keeps the icy-hand on my body. My front and back are burning. Words are coming across mountains.

Calling me from too far to go too far. I’m setting out. Now my moon-expedition will start.

Dawn comes. Light ice-cotton is flying in. Now sunlit is coming on me and one-two-three at a glance many flowers, many sunlit flowers are blooming, among them someone

Or few are absorbing in feature-film play, few are whispering near my ears in a very pleasant tune and I’m going. My moon-expedition.

I came across so many birthdays, and rebirths. Once I was in warmth to you, those you are here today. Can you recognize me in this shadow-fair? You’re standing with extinguishing lamp near bottle-gourd scaffold, but the faces are clearly bloomed. Long ago in husking-pedal room, my hands and feet were starting to flash and I’m seeing wondered. When I came out, the leaves of mango-jamb caress over my body, water wallow on my whole body, in romping sigh many breasts ransack my wind. You all see me, watch me minutely. Do you see your relative? I have got you now in and out of first-birth. You all surround me.

Again are you all near me? Now I’m reading the book of trial-pass prostrate. While reading, I’m writing on the notebook replacing the book. What am I writing? Not the extent of skull. I’m writing poem… thinking a face two eagerly eyes, slightly opened lips. Love? But awful wind has jumped, oh, where shall I keep my nest? Between the crowds a face is missing. Good-bye love! Good-bye birth! Move aside, shadows!

Can the words of this life be ended until I will die! Now, I’m ill, I’m lying on bed. Who you are shadowy, visiting me? All are known names, very known. But when and where I got? I’m thinking. I will recognize obviously. Wait, I shall unit this birth with that birth, first. Yes, now I can recognize. Shadows are giving light all through the room, shadows are painting colorful pictures. What a wonderful discovery we have! I gratified life with love. Then come now to sink in fathomless shadow, we shall become the shadow in shadow.

Now it ends, my words were ended up too. Adieu! Yet if you don’t desire to give me to depart, I shall lye here on the dust-bed.